I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the notion of the long haul.
The long haul of parenting.
The long haul of creating a fulfilling and joyful life.
The long haul of COVID-19.
The long haul of relationships.
The long haul of anti-racism work.
The long haul of creating health in every stage of life.
The long haul of inner growth and healing.
And the long haul of any meaningful, real change.
It feels like right now the world is asking us to evolve and to find out who we are in the face of sustained, ongoing challenge.
Many of the women I talk to are weary and questioning. Exhausted and yet also hopeful. I’m having a lot of conversations about endurance and possibility. Participation and self care.
So today, I wanted to share two simple ideas that I am using in my own life right now so that I can keep showing up for the long haul of my individual life and also for the trajectory of how I want to be as a citizen of this earth for the remainder of my time here.
Sunday Meeting:
Since having my daughter, my experience of time has shifted dramatically. Some days feel eternally long, other days fly by.
Every time I say she was born almost two years ago, I can hardly process what it means that so much time has passed. On the one hand I’m not sure where those two years went, on the other hand I know exactly how they were spent.
Add in the altered space/time continuum of COVID-19 to the mix, less novelty, more monotony and I can feel really perplexed about where the past three months have gone.
One of the ways that I have attempted to stay connected to myself and clear about the through line of my own life is to host a Sunday meeting with myself.
If I have a meeting with a client, I show up. If I have a commitment with my friend, I show up. If I have a slotted time with my husband, I show up.
And yet, it is all too easy to let days and weeks fly by without that conscious, carved out time to meet with myself and the deeper truth of what is happening for me.
And so I started putting a date on the calendar with myself every Sunday. Sometimes I have no idea what to do or where to begin, but the date is there and so I show up.
This is a time when I typically review the past week, look at the week ahead, re-read journal notes, write if I feel inspired, reflect on what is important to me and where I want and need to place my attention.
I inquire into what is happening for me at a deeper level and I reckon with the unsettled parts of myself and my life. Just like other relationships, sometimes I leave more clear and joyful, other times I leave uncertain and uncomfortable.
Regardless of what happens, I know that I showed up. I put the time in. I demonstrated to myself that I matter and that I am worth spending time, energy and effort on.
This is how I reboot and a recenter toward Self.
Routine:
Routine can be grounding.
Routine can be stifling.
Routine can be self-punishing.
Routine can be self-honoring.
With so much uncertainty and upheaval in the collective right now, I have been leaning heavily into my routines.
The gentle way I open the door to wake my daughter up in the morning and how we cuddle and read. The way I place the pillows when I make my bed or the little prayer our family says before dinner.
What helps me is not only that these predictable things are happening, but that I am having the awareness to notice that they are happening and I am receiving the sweetness of them in my body, mind and heart.
These are not elaborate life-changing rituals, rather the moment-to-moment simple practices that when strung together make up my life. The counter wiped clean, the warm laundry put away, the hum of the dishwasher, the evening pillow chat with my husband.
These are the moments. I am grateful for these moments however ordinary, however basic.
I’m curious about you.
How are you figuring out ways to show up for the long haul?
What are your routines?
How do you come back to your Self when the demands of life and the world want to pull you away?
If you’re struggling to feel centered in your Self or grounded as the days come and go, I invite you to play with these ideas, make them your own and see if they help.
As always, I’m sending you my heartfelt respect and appreciation for the journey that you’re on and wherever you may find yourself today.
In service,
Emma
P.S. I’ve still got some big news to share and I’m excited to be in touch next week about it, so keep an eye out!
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